Violet is two. I'm not quite sure what the title should be for 2 because we all know that Violet hit terrible 2 at 1....so I'm thinking maybe terrifying two? Or Extremely flexible and violent 2? Chris has stopped calling her Violet or Weebie and refers to her as "Violent Biaper" now, which sounds like a band name. Or maybe something that happens to you when you're an elderly person who wears depends and can't handle spicy food anymore. Violet calls her diapers, Biapers....so Chris calls her Violent Biaper. She answers to it, so I guess she doesn't mind. She thinks she wants to potty train, but isn't sure. Her favorite thing to do is tell me "I have to go hotty" and run to the bathroom, sit on the toilet for about 10 minutes, then get up and pee all over the floor. I'm constantly mopping now, more than before. Which means that I basically smell like Pine Sol all of the time, and that's ok. It's better than smelling like Pee. :)
Violent Biaper is also very very flexible. She can put her feet over her head EASILY...without blinking an eye. She can do the splits, regular and super painful looking, and doesn't even have to think about how much it should be hurting . So, that having been said you probably understand that there isn't a car seat that can hold her. I think she took some notes from her car seat escape artist brother James Henry because she can get out of that thing fast...houdini style. The only thing that is keeping her in is the little strap between her legs, she can't get it undone yet....she can shimmy out though, but usually I can notice that and stop her...or make Wyatt stop her. I just call Wyatt the enforcer anymore, have you seen him? He's an OX. I can't afford to feed that kid! Please send food!...
So, on the way home from the 4H fair awards tonight, in which I had to have Violent Biaper in a stroller that she hates in the heat for 2 hours...boy was that FUN, she decided it would be fun to just get au natural. Yep. She got naked. She took her clothes off and I mean ALL OF HER CLOTHES OFF. Even her diaper, while remaining strapped in. One minute she was dressed, the next minute she was waving her diaper in the area saying, "Mama! I nakey!!!" THis made for a tense ride home. I was so hoping that she wouldn't potty in her carseat....it was a white knuckle ride back from Clinton. Thankfully she waited until she got in the house and ran to the bathroom, and peed right in front of the toilet. :( "Mama! I Hotty!" Yep. I can see that. Ugh.
I'm desperately thinking of a positive spin for this...I know there must be one, but I'm too tired. Violent Biaper has broken me. When she gets in trouble now she pulls her pants down and smacks her little butt and says, "Whip my butt." and runs away laughing. She whips herself and a laughs....
On a side note I almost died in my garage today. A bull snake slithered right by me as I was getting an extra putter for the kids. A SNAKE SLITHERED BY ME IN MY GARAGE! Stroke. Heart attack. Freaking out. Thank God the enforcer was home. He has been standing guard ever since with a shovel because, "Mom, you can split snakes with a shovel you know."
Shew. Thank Goodness he's on the job....
Violent Biaper is also very very flexible. She can put her feet over her head EASILY...without blinking an eye. She can do the splits, regular and super painful looking, and doesn't even have to think about how much it should be hurting . So, that having been said you probably understand that there isn't a car seat that can hold her. I think she took some notes from her car seat escape artist brother James Henry because she can get out of that thing fast...houdini style. The only thing that is keeping her in is the little strap between her legs, she can't get it undone yet....she can shimmy out though, but usually I can notice that and stop her...or make Wyatt stop her. I just call Wyatt the enforcer anymore, have you seen him? He's an OX. I can't afford to feed that kid! Please send food!...
So, on the way home from the 4H fair awards tonight, in which I had to have Violent Biaper in a stroller that she hates in the heat for 2 hours...boy was that FUN, she decided it would be fun to just get au natural. Yep. She got naked. She took her clothes off and I mean ALL OF HER CLOTHES OFF. Even her diaper, while remaining strapped in. One minute she was dressed, the next minute she was waving her diaper in the area saying, "Mama! I nakey!!!" THis made for a tense ride home. I was so hoping that she wouldn't potty in her carseat....it was a white knuckle ride back from Clinton. Thankfully she waited until she got in the house and ran to the bathroom, and peed right in front of the toilet. :( "Mama! I Hotty!" Yep. I can see that. Ugh.
I'm desperately thinking of a positive spin for this...I know there must be one, but I'm too tired. Violent Biaper has broken me. When she gets in trouble now she pulls her pants down and smacks her little butt and says, "Whip my butt." and runs away laughing. She whips herself and a laughs....
On a side note I almost died in my garage today. A bull snake slithered right by me as I was getting an extra putter for the kids. A SNAKE SLITHERED BY ME IN MY GARAGE! Stroke. Heart attack. Freaking out. Thank God the enforcer was home. He has been standing guard ever since with a shovel because, "Mom, you can split snakes with a shovel you know."
Shew. Thank Goodness he's on the job....
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